White Man Speaks With Forked Tongue
The Age
Thursday March 13, 2008
WHEN Jean Chretien was in charge of the land of moose and maple leaves, his constituents used to joke that Canada had two official languages - but the Prime Minister spoke neither. Now it appears Australia has a leader who finds it hard to speak the sole official tongue of the land. Plain English, that is. After a week of tortured word play and semantic calisthenics over whether he would axe bonuses for carers and pensioners, Kevin Rudd was still trying to stamp out the public relations bushfire yesterday.
Having spent the previous day uttering impenetrable phrases that failed to say explicitly if the cash would still be paid as a lump sum, his minders clarified late on Tuesday night that it would.And so the issue lived to fight another day. Even yesterday he could not bring himself to utter those words "lump sum". Now we all know that Rudd is a clever clogs with an intellect that puts many mortals in the shade. But if the bloke could call a spade a spade, he might spare himself some political pain.Julia Gillard, meantime, who most certainly speaks Strine, was entertaining with revelations that the previous government had sought to fix the skills crisis with a $3 million investment in training manicurists and make-up artists. She mused on the contrast with the lack of training for miners and builders. "You might not have been able to get a house built, but you could always go down to the beauty parlour and make yourself feel better about it," she cried.
© 2008 The Age
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